In order to find his equal, and Irishman is forced to talk to God, says Stephen the Mad Irish in Braveheart. Now apparently I apply this statement to my own brain. In order to entertain myself, I must tell the story myself.
So I just woke up. It's pretty early for me, but I had to write this down because a vivid dream like this always seems so vivid until you have a shower and its gone forever.
Enter Dream:
It's a sad farewell, two of my friends who are both scientists, one focusing on bugs the other focusing on human conditions are leaving on an expedition to Antarctica. It seems like the future, but I still worry for them, Antarctica is a bad place to live. Anyways, brain morphs forward, and they're there, and the whole scenery changes from terrible arctic to something out of southwestern Ontario, snowy, but not insane. Anyways, the community of scientists have discovered some crater in the snow down there, cause by an asteroid, and have been farming the mushrooms found within this crater.
Fast Forward Brain: Goddamn, we're eating these fucking mushrooms now! Brewing a tea and calling it moonjuice. Making gum outta this shit. Maybe the massive storm cut off supplies, I have no idea, but people are divided, should we eat the mushrooms or just eat canned food and wait for more stuff? The blizzard is bad out there.
More after the break...
Form the Mushroom Cult: That's right, there's a cult forming around these little fungi, and they don't like people who don't eat the mushrooms, not one bit. They're also trying real hard to hide the fact that... the Mushrooms turn you into some weird dog-man that can withstand terribly low temperatures and makes you run on all 4's in the snow if you choose.
Heart Break: My Friend bugboy doesn't eat the shrooms (weird for him), and his girlfriend does. Now we got a whole temptress thing going on. Cult's all after him and shit, and he figures he's gotta go. Enter yours truly. I get a call I gotta save him, cause cult is all pissy. So I boot it down to Antarctica. Oh shit, his resolve failed, he's in some mushroom daze, and there's a massive blizzard coming. He's not so far gone as to be a dogman though, so we're good. He can be saved.
Mother of All Blizzards coming folks, we're talking Epic Snow Movie Cold (Day after tomorrow) shit. Anyways, I pull bug boy out of there, onto my plane (oh yeah, I'm ballin' with a plane and shit). Mushroom freaks are PISSED, I'm stealing one of their cults. Dog-man running at my plane as I'm trying to take off, I'm scared and shit, blizzard coming, gunna freeze my plane and dog-men are gunna kill my ass.
Thanks Brain, you skipped the scary part, and I'm back home with bugboy, who's shut up in his apartment like Ewan MacGregor in Train Spotting, trying to get his shit together and off the mushrooms so he doesn't become dogboy.
Boom, bugboy has a brother. Me and him are friends too, we're both worried about bugboy, so we visit him one day. Apartment empty, apparently instead of writing a goodbye letter, Bugboy wrote me a goodbye letter using Math Symbols I barely remember to say goodbye. Went to Korea. Wrote goodbye letter to random brother in crayons. Very confused. He's gone though.
..............
Yeah, there was also something like a scene out of Grapes of Wrath except the whole family was dogpeople, trying to go after bugboy, and some cult scene where the main dog bitch was preaching about how the mushrooms save humanity or some shit, and how being a dogperson is better than normal.
Welcome to my brain. Emergency exits are toward your fore and aft.
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